Undesided right now
by Death By Insanity
Summary: Her mom died at 11, her dad got remarried at13 and has a 3 year old little brother. They're moving to Forks, WA which is where basicly everything happens it her favorite seris, The Twilight Saga. Sorry Summery sux hope story better HITUS
1. Chapter One: The Beginning

**December 31, 2010 I have edited some of it. I have not changed much of the story. Just minor details.**

**Hey everyone! I know you weren't expecting me to get a new story out for some time since I told you in my Author's note in the last chapter of my story, which yes the name got changed again, that's what the fifth or sixth time I've done that. Anyway, I said that my stories were locked. Not all of them because I hadn't typed up all of my stories. This is one that I had been working on for a few months, but wasn't letting anyone see it until I had a few chapters done. Well since I have a total of three chapters done, I thought that I would type up this, and post it. Now for the part that no author really likes, the disclaimer.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. No matter how much I want it so, I don't own it.**

**Claimer: I do however claim the characters of Amy, Joshua and Bella's personality.**

**Chapter One: The Beginning**

I walked in and smiled. He was still as gorgeous as he had always been. That's one reason why I could never forget him. Another reason was his smile and his personality.

My name a whisper on his lips, as a smile graced his face. His voice silky smooth, velvety even. I walked toward him as he walked toward me. I stopped noticing his eyes. Black. Coal black. I started backing away. He must have seen the fear in my eyes because suddenly he stopped coming toward me. Just as suddenly as he stopped, he was gone.

I woke up with a start. "I have got to stop reading those books before I go to bed." You're probably wondering what books, but I think many of you already know what books. The Twilight Saga of course. My friends say I'm obsessed. Ya so what, I've read the Saga more times then I can count and that I have three copies of each book. Today, I was moving to Forks, Washington. The fan-girl in me continued to freak out as our stuff was being shipped out there today. As I got up and put the Saga away, I saw my step-mom, Amy step into the hallway.

"Bella put those in the box. I want to have everything at the house when we get there and if that box isn't in the truck in the next ten minutes, it's not going to be there."

Why, oh why did Dad marry her? Oh that's right, she's 'rich'. NOT! No, it's because she is very beautiful, at least that's what Dad says every time I ask him why.

"Baby girl you heard Amy, now get them in the truck so Roger can get them to the new house," Dad said. Roger is he friend from work.

He is always sticking up for her. It is sad because even I am unable to win against her because Dad is always on her side and never mine. Ever since Mom dies six years ago, Dad has been planning to move. It is as if he wants to forget all of the memories of Mom that are here. Then, he went and got married to Amy and nine months later, I had a baby brother named Joshua. So now, at 17, I have a three-year-old brother that calls me Mommy. Doesn't that say just how much Amy watches her own son? I'm always the one to take care of him, not Amy.

The next few hours went by fast. We were on the highway just a few miles before Forks came into view. I was waiting to drive past the high school and then I saw the sign: Welcome to Forks, Washington. Finally! Within twenty minutes, we had made it to the house. I flung open my door, ran up to my room, and began to unpack. If I unpack every now, I could learn the roads and where everything is in this place.

After two long hours of unpacking, I walked around the house. Joshua's room was next to mine, which wasn't at all a surprise to me considering Amy decided who went where. Across the hall was another room, empty for now. Next to it was a bathroom. On the upper floor is my dad's and Amy's room, along with Dad's office and another bathroom. Of course, the master bedroom had its own bathroom. On the ground floor are the Kitchen, Dinning room, and the Living room. In the basement was a smaller room, which is the Laundry room.

"I'm going to go look around the town for a while. Ok, Dad?" I asked.

"Sure, but take Joshua with you. Make sure you both wear your coats and have an umbrella with you."

With that, I got Joshua ready to go, put my coat on and out the door we went. After an hour of walking, we had seen the entire town, minus the neighbor hoods. When we had gotten to the school, classes were in session, but I still went to the main office, got my schedule, and found where all of my classes are at, this way I will not be lost tomorrow.

While we were at the school, I saw the famous Volvo. The fan-girl in me was jumping like crazy, but I couldn't let anyone see me actually jumping up and down like a mad person. When we got home, I put Joshua in his room to play, while I decided what I was going to wear for tomorrow. If the Cullen's really are real then I would want to wear an outfit that Alice would approve of. Soon after deciding, I fell asleep.

I woke up in the morning to Joshua jumping on my bed. "Mommy, wakey up. You got sool day." Translation for those that can't speak three year old speak, he said, Mommy, wake up. You have school today.

"Ok, ok, I'm up. There you happy, you little sleep stealer." I smiled at the comment because he's been known to wake me up the most. I went and got him ready for daycare, then got myself ready for school. Even though I was there yesterday, I was still worried what people would think of me today.

**Ok now I want everybody to review. I want your opinions on how this first chapter turned out. So please review this and add it to your alerts so you can see the new chapters when they come out. I will not post the second chapter until I get back from my Uncle Paul's wedding on March 13. I probably will not get back until the 15 of March. Yes I know that that I still twenty some odd days away, but I want to give people time to read and review this story. Until then, bye.**

**Now please follow this and review and or add to alerts. And give me some title ideas. **


	2. Chapter Two: Knowledge

**December 31, 2010 I have edited some of it. I have not changed much of the story. Just minor details.**

**Hey everyone. I have been home for a week and I remembered that I said I would post the second chapter sometime after I got back. Well here I am. Ready with the second chapter. Please read and review when you're done.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. No matter how much I want it so, I don't own it.**

**Claimer: I do however claim the characters of Amy, Joshua and Bella's personality.**

_Previously:_

_I woke up in the morning to Joshua jumping on my bed. "Mommy, wakey up. You got sool day." Translation for those that can't speak three year old speak, he said, Mommy, wake up. You have school today._

_"Ok, ok, I'm up. There you happy, you little sleep stealer." I smiled at the comment because he's been known to wake me up the most. I went and got him ready for daycare, then got myself ready for school. Even though I was there yesterday, I was still worried what people would think of me today._

**Chapter 2: Knowledge**

As I drove to the daycare, I wondered how today would go. It is common knowledge that when you are the new kid, people will be whispering about you. I got out of my car and went around the side to get Joshua out of his car seat.

"Mommy, what dis pwase?" Joshua asked. (Mommy, what is this place?)

"This is where you will be staying while I am at school." I answered. I walked in the door with Joshua on my hip. The woman at the counter looked up from what she was doing when the bell above the door dinged when I opened it.

"Hello dear. How can I help you?" The woman asked. I saw a nametag on her shirt and it said Esme.

"Um, hi. I was just dropping him off." I said nodding my head toward Joshua.

"How cute, how old is he?" Esme asked.

"He's three years old. Look um, I need to get to school. So could I just drop him off with his stuff and pick him up after school?"

"Of course dear. Your little boy will be just fine here."

"Thanks, but he's not mine. He's just my little brother."

"Mommy, down." Joshua said looking at the blocks. I set him down and he went toward the blocks.

"Just your little brother, huh?" Esme questioned.

"He really is my little brother, it's just my step-mom makes me watch him all of the time. I don't mind really, I like taking care of him."

"Oh ok dear. Well if you want to get to school on time, you might want to get going."

"Thank you. Joshua, I will be back after I get out of school, ok?" I said calling him over from the blocks.

"Otay Mommy." He said as he continued to play with the blocks.

With that, I drove over to the school. As I got out of my car, I noticed most of the student body was watching me. I heard the whispers and the felt their stares as I walked toward my first class. I went into the classroom and saw that there were very few students already in the room. I guess most of the class was still out in the parking lot. I walked up to the teacher's desk and had him sign the slip that I had gotten yesterday. Mr. Mason looked at the paper, signed it and handed it back to me. He pointed to a seat in the back and I took that as the place where I would be sitting for now on.

I heard the bell ring and the students filled into the classroom. One by one they took their seats but not before looking at me.

"Look at her."

"Has Mr. Mason finally lost his mind?"

"She's next to a Cullen."

I looked around the room to connect the voices to their owners, only I saw no one talking. I guess moving here was bound to drive me crazy. I heard a chair scrap next to me, so I looked. Oh My Cullen! It's Jasper. This is Jasper's English class too. Wow. Jasper wasn't in the English class in the book. I guess there are some things that will differ from the book. I looked as Jasper and smiled warmly. No harm in being nice. I kept my emotions clear as not to set Jasper off, but maybe keeping them in check will make Jasper more curious. The fan-girl in me wouldn't stop jumping. If I was going to keep calm then all things Twilight had to stop setting of the fan-girl.

When the class was over, I walked over to the next building. I had government next. Joy.

"You're Isabella Swan, right." Oh no. It's coping the book. I might as well too. It might be cool.

"Bella," I corrected.

"Where's your next class?"

"Right here actually. What's your name?" Hey, I might as well figure out who is who.

"Oh right. My name is Eric. The eyes and ears of this place." Oh no, now it's quoting the movie too. The book is right; he is excessively over helpful.

Just then, the bell rang to get to class. Thank god, I'm saved. The next few classes went by fast. Soon it was lunch. A few of the girls that I had met in my other classes offered me to sit with them. As we walked into the cafeteria, the other students hushed. Listening for what I might say. I got into line with Jessica, got our food, paid for it and sat down at the lunch table. Only then did the talking pick back up.

I looked around the room for any sign of the Cullen's. So far, my searches had come up empty. As I looked around the room, I finally saw the famous corner. It was all the way in the back as far as possible from the rest of the student population. I saw them all sit down at their table and pick up their food, pretending to eat it. I continued to watch them, as they sat there staring at their props. As I watched them, I saw Edward's face turn into a smirk. I wondered if Edward could actually hear me or if my mind was blocked, like in the book.

"Bella," I heard someone say.

"What?" I asked as I turned toward Jessica.

"Do you know them?"

"No," I lied, "who are they?"

"The Cullen's and Hale's. They are Dr. and Mrs. Cullen's adopted children. Rosalie and Jasper Hale are Mrs. Cullen's niece and nephew. Their parents died when there were like eight years old, so they have been with them since then. Then there are the Cullen's, Edward, Emmett and Alice. Rosalie and Emmett, Jasper and Alice are together but Edward over there is single. He thinks he's too good for anyone and sticks with his family."

I wonder how many times Edward has turned Jessica down, I thought.

"So was that like your son with you when you were here yesterday?" I guess Jessica was in one of the rooms that had their door open when Joshua had called me Mommy.

"Actually, he's my little brother, but he calls me Mommy because my step-mom, his mom, leaves him with me all of the time." I guess that shocked her because she shut up.

"Edward's looking at the new girl."

"What's he looking at her for? He could be looking at me instead."

"She's not pretty at all, so why is he starring at her?"

"Damn, that new girl is hot. I want to..."

I looked around to see who was saying these things, but like earlier I didn't see anyone talking toward me. It sounded like it the person saying it was saying it right to my ear.

"Bella, are you okay? What are you starring at? You look so confused." The girl named Missy asked me.

"I am confused. I thought I heard someone talking in my ear. It was really clear too. I don't know. Maybe I am going crazy from the stress of moving here."

With that, the bell rang and I went to my next class, Biology. Mr. Banner was already at his desk, going through what looked like a bunch of papers for this class. I got his attention, showed him the paper, and got it signed. Then Mr. Banner handed me a book and told me where to sit. I looked and saw that it was not next to Edward. I was seated at the desk in front of Edward. The fan-girl in me was sad but was also happy because Alice was sitting next to Edward.

I hope Alice saw me coming today and had her schedule changed so Edward will not leave and go to Alaska. As I walked closer toward the desk, I saw Edward start to get up, but nano seconds later Alice pushed him back down. That's not good.

"Edward, no! You will regret it. I've seen it and I won't let you hurt her."

I saw Edward nod his head once. My eyes widened. My heart sped up. I tried to slow it down, but suddenly all I saw was blackness surrounding me.

**Well what did you think? Tell me. I wrote this story not to please the fans, but to please myself. I am like other authors. I don't write just for the fans. I write because I like to. If you did like it though, you should review it. I don't care if you don't have an account, still review. That's why I have the anonymous reviewer thing on. So tell me what you thought of it. If you think that I'm moving to fast let me know. Chapter Three: Awakening will not be posted for at least another month. So please Review, review, review. If you like it so far tell your friends to read it.**


	3. Chapter Three: Awakening

December 31, 2010 I have edited some of it. I have not changed much of the story. Just minor details.

3/23/2010 Well everybody. I thought since I just posted Chapter Two: Knowledge, I would get started typing the next chapter. As I forgot to mention in my Author's note in the last chapter, I am going to hang out with the guy that I haven't seen for about five or so years. I like him and never really stopped liking him. We are going to go see a movie on Thursday and I am excited except he wants me to bring my best friend with me. My best friend and I rarely ever talk at school because we live in different worlds. Now I'm all for hanging out with them both but one of us girls is going to feel like the third wheel and I don't want either of us to. I just hope he doesn't bring his girlfriend that's for sure.

7/3/2010 I'm so sorry everybody. Life got a bit busy and I lost my notebook with the story in it. I was originally going to post an Author's Note but I hadn't realized that I never got this chapter out or even really started, so as you know it was not posted at all. This is what I had had all ready to be posted until I realized chapter three hadn't even been started.

**5/16/2010**

**Hey Readers,**

**I'm sorry I haven't updated in like two months. Some stuff came up and I wasn't able to type or post any new chapters. Anyway, I am back, but I am not sure when I will be able to get the next chapter out and ready for you all to read. I will try to have it ready before I leave for Iowa. I'm leaving on the 27th of this month and won't be back until the 4th of June. That week of June 7 to June 11 is VBS at my church. V.B.S. stands for Vacation Bible School. Anyway, I'm going to try really hard to get the next chapter done. Well actually, the next chapter might not come out until after V.B.S. because I have TWO final projects to finish and they are like half of my grade and well let's just say I'm kind of risking my grade by taking the time to do this instead of my Biology and English projects. So please don't be mad at me for not getting chapters out sooner, but I promise that I will work on the story while I am in Iowa. Err...make that try to work on it while I am in Iowa. Either way there will be at least ONE chapter done and up before the end of June. Sorry that this wasn't a new chapter. Please don't give up on me.**

**Tina**

**So as you can see I was planning on having this chapter up way sooner then this, well close to this. The two final projects that I was talking about, well I got a C and a B. Not really what I was hoping for, but at least I passed. So as of this very minute, I am only half way done with writing chapter four. Sadly, chapter four will not be posted until after July 18.**

**I say that because I am going on a Mission Trip with my youth group and we leave on the 10 before 9 am. So if I remember, I will be bringing my notebook with me to work on in the car. Trust me, as long as I remember my notebook the chapter will get finished because I am stuck in a car where I do not like the driver.**

**So has anyone seen ECLIPSE? Tell me how you liked it. Me well I thought that it was amazing, definitely worth going more then once. I went on the 30 with most of our youth group and this cute guy that goes to our church. He's my age and he's really sweet and I've had an on and off crush on him for the last three years. Sad I know. My favorite part had to be, well actually I had two favorite parts. The bedroom scene after Bella said yes and of course Jake and Bella kissing. Tell me your favorite scene.**

**7/24/2010 I did it again. I am so sorry. Well as you can tell I am back from the Mission Trip. No my notebook did not come with me. I wish it would have but it didn't. We got back the 18. It's funny. When we left the hotel (by the way we had gotten car assignment changes so I was in the car that I had wanted to be in all along) Mrs. R (youth leader) took some pictures. Of what you might ask. Well, me and the other two that was in the back of the car. They were sleeping, me well I was almost asleep. She got two of me. Two pictures of Daniel and two pictures of Brandi. Technically one of Brandi's and Daniel's is the exact same one. She said that she did that to prove to the church that we worked our buts off in Pine Hill, New Mexico. (MISS YOU GUYS!) It was fun and lots of work. Hahaha, um we ended up going hiking around a lake on Tuesday afternoon after working, and um, well it started to pour down. Let's just say at one point on the way back, I literally sat in the mud. To quote a Youth Leader: 'It was a mud slip n' slide.' It was fun though. Um not much went on other then we got the church painted (inside and out minus the ceiling [because they wanted to do it themselves] and the sanctuary [because it was already done]), the Parsonage painted (only the out because we couldn't do inside), and the Youth building (outside only, they didn't want us to do inside). **

**So I was going to work on the chapter(s) yesterday, but I have no excuse for it. Today while dog sitting for Mr. & Mrs. R, I worked not on this story, but I've had ideas floating around inside my head for the last, oh I don't know, two weeks maybe. So I thought I would get them written down. So after this chapter, I will be posting a few new ones. Only I'm not sure when any of them will be posted. I don't even know about this chapter. I am such a bad author. :( **

**Now I think I am able to get to the actual chapter. So I will delay no longer. Here is chapter three: Awakening. **

_Previously: _

_I saw Edward nod his head once. My eyes widened. My heart sped up. I tried to slow it down, but suddenly all I saw was blackness surrounding me. _

**Chapter Three: Awakening**

I opened my eyes to a white light, and heard the most annoying beeping. It was then I realized that I'm in a freaking hospital. Wait, I'm in a hospital? OMG I get to met Carlisle!

"How is she Dr. Cullen?" I heard someone ask.

"Well, I believe that you can ask her yourself, sir. Hello Isabella."

Well at least I don't have to worry about who's who here. I smiled at that thought.

"Hi Daddy." I said looking over at him. It was then that I looked around the room. It was the normal hospital room setting, just it looked much, much nicer then a normal hospital room. The walls were purple (my favorite color), and the windows had dark brown curtains that kept the sun out (that's the kind I'm getting to put in my room). Daddy was at the head of my bed, on my left.

"There's my little girl. What happened? How are you feeling?" He asked in a rush.

"I feel fine now Daddy. All I remember was being in Biology, I freaked out then all I saw was black, at least until I woke up."

"What caused you to freak out, Isabella?"

"I like Bella better, but can I talk to you alone, Dr. Cullen?"

I looked at my daddy and he nodded his head as Dr. Cullen said, "I guess you can." I looked at the clock in my room, then to my dad.

"Um, Daddy? Since today is your first day at work shouldn't you go back?"

Daddy looked at the clock then at me. "Are you sure, princess? I could stay here."

"No you should go back to work. If it's all right with Dr. Cullen, I could go home with him. I was able to meet some of his kids, and I was hoping to get to know them better. That and to find out what I missed in my other classes."

"Well, um, that's alright with me. What about you Dr. Cullen? What do you think?" Daddy asked him.

Dr. Cullen looked at me curiously and answered, "Sure. I'm sure that the children would like that. Don't worry Mr. Swan; your daughter will be in good hands."

With that comment, Daddy came over, kissed my head, told me that he would see me tonight and went out the door. When I was sure Daddy was out of normal hearing range, I looked at Dr. Cullen with a serious face.

"Now Isa-Bella, what had you 'freaked out' about so much that you fainted?"

Oh boy was he about to get a surprise. "I freaked out because I found out that what I read is true and that I can read minds, just like Edward."

Dr. Cullen froze as I said Edward. "It's ok, Dr. Cullen. You can trust me; I will not tell anyone that Edward can read minds because if I didn't then that would mean I would have to admit that I can too. Well now I can, but still.

As I spoke, Dr. Cullen relaxed, only there was something strange about the way he became relaxed. To me it was too relaxed. With that thought, I began to concentrate on listening to his thoughts.

"How on earth is a human girl read minds. This is quite weird. It looks like I'm going to have to tell the family that we need to move because a human can read their minds or tell them to watch their thoughts because a human can read their minds. Oh, um hello Bella." With that I jumped back into the real world.

"Now Bella, what all did you hear from my children's minds?" He asked it in such a tone like he was talking to a two year old.

"Ok first off I will not be treated like a freaking two year old just because I said that I can read minds. Don't think I'm crazy because I heard Alice, I heard people in the cafeteria, and I saw Edward nod to what I heard Alice say, and plus I heard what you said. So basically, you can't move away. Please you just can't. I don't know why, but I can read minds."

At the end, I was crying, but just the thought of Edward moving broke my heart. I looked up at Carlisle and saw his face. It was a mixture of fear, shock and thought I saw a flicker of adornment. He suddenly came out of his shock and stated at me, and I mean starred. Well I guess it could be worse. I mean I could have told him everything about the Twilight Saga. Another good thing is Edward can't read my mind, but he still wants my blood.

"Bella, what all do you know about my family?" he asked hesitantly.

"Quite a lot really. Err, mostly everything. I thin the only people that I don't know much about their human life are Emmett, Esme, you and of course Alice, but even she doesn't know that much about hers, if anything really. I know how you all were changed, including Alice. Oh, that reminds me, I need to talk to Alice. It might help if you all hunted first. I'll see you at your house. Or if Alice wouldn't mind picking me up. I'm sure she knows where I live. Oh and I have to have Rosalie teach me more about cars. It's just mine needs a tune up and" I was cut off by a knock on the door.

"Excuse me, Dr. Cullen, your son Edward is here. He says it's urgent." The nurse stated.

"Just tell him to come here..." he began as I interrupted him.

"No, he can't. He can't because," I began but continued in a very low whisper, "because one he can't read my mind and two my blood 'sings' to him and I would rather not be sucked dry."

"Um, ok. Tell Edward that I will be right out." With that, the nurse left and looked at me curiously.

"Just trust me, ok doc. Look at his eyes when you go out, and see if they go darker. Trust me." He looked at me then the door and went out, but he came back in shortly after.

"You're right. His eyes did get darker as he smelled your scent coming off of my coat."

"Is he leaving to go visit Tanya and her family fro a while?" I asked, my heart beginning to break.

"I don't know where he's going, all I know is he wanted the keys to my car." With him saying that, I began to sob.

"No, he has to come back here. Please he has to come back. I need him." Carlisle looked at me like had truly lost my mind, so I continued.

"The first time that I saw him, it was like a magnetic pull. I wanted to be closer and when I found out in Biology class that Alice was sitting next to Edward, my heart hurt. It was as if I couldn't get close enough to him. I know that you won't make him, but please tell him to come back. Have me talk to him, just hearing my voice should change his mind, right?"

Carlisle looked at me and took out his cell phone. "Hello Edward" "Yes I know but...""Just wait a moment and listen." He said as he handed me the phone.

"Edward"

"Who is this?" he asked angrily.

"Just please listen to me."

"And why should I?"

"Because your heart says you should. Besides, what does your heart say right now, about me?"

"It says that I need to find you. Make you _mine_!

"Then come and find me." I said as I hung up. "Carlisle, will you please take me to your house. On the way there, never mind Alice already knows."

"Sure. Just give me a moment." Within that moment, I was signed out of the hospital, released and needle/wireless. Carlisle and I walk out the main doors for that wing, went toward the hidden area, and on his back in seconds. With all else forgotten, besides Alice, the ride to the Cullen home was better then I had thought that it was going to be. Eh, it doesn't help that that Bella doesn't how amazing it truly is to be 'flying' through the forest trees. As we got closer to the home, we saw Alice waiting impatiently to take me 'away'.

"Come on Bella, I don't have much time to work with. He will be her soon." Alice said as I was transferred from Carlisle to Alice.

She ran up the stairs to Edward's room, and stripped me as she helped me get dressed in something a little bit more revealing outfit. In other words an outfit that would make Emmett stop saying that he is a prude.

"Less then a minute. Bye Bella. Have fun." She said in a rush. What seemed like minutes, Edward was in front of me.

"Why did the trail have to be so confusing, my dear Bella?"

"Well I wanted to get here and have Alice's help. Do you like?" I asked as his eyes finally fell downward. He didn't answer me. Instead, he starred at me with hungry eyes. If it were for my blood, Alice would have seen it. So I'm going to say that it is for my body.

With what happened next, I will NEVER forget.

**A/N: Holy smokes. I actually finished this? Yay. :) So what did you think? My long author's note up top is way to long. I can't believe it has been that long since an actual chapter was put up. Well now, you got it. Now don't go counting on chapter 4 to be here anytime soon. I haven't even hit the half waypoint yet.**


	4. Chapter Four: Hope

**A/N: I'M BACK! Sorry that I've been gone for so long. I have been trying my best to keep all of my grades up and I did it. I have also gotten into Job Corps. My flight leaves at 11 AM on Tuesday, January 4. I just found the notebook that had this story in it, I originally had 100% no clue which notebook it was in. **

**Now before I begin, the ending of the chapter before made me think of some things that would make me possible change the rating. Since Joshua is still at the daycare, nothing can really happen. Thus meaning, what I have written in the notebook needs some changes.**

**Oh and one small detail that I did not mention in the last two chapters was that in this story, the high school does not end until 4 o'clock and she passed out around 3 o'clock. It is now 4:20 in this story and the daycare closes at 4:30. That might not seem important to you, but it's a time frame. Another important fact that is a SEMI-MAJOR change in this chapter, Bella is in her normal clothing, nothing too revealing.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. No matter how much I want it so, I don't own it.**

**Claimer: I do however claim the characters of Amy, Joshua and Bella's personality.**

_"With what happened next, I will NEVER forget."_

**Chapter 4: Hope**

Edward went to pounce on me. I moved out of his path only seconds before he would have touched me. I went and sat at his desk on the other side of the room. I looked around his room and realized that it is larger then what I thought that it might look like and definitely larger then in the movie.

"Edward" I said.

"What is it Bella?" He asked.

"Come with me."

"Where to?"

"I need to pick up Joshua, and my car is still at the school."

Edward nodded and sighed. "I was hoping that we would be able to talk and get to know each other. Would you prefer Alice to have your car brought here or would you still want me to take you?"

"If you take me, then we will be able to talk more. You could probably bring the Volvo back here after I pick up Joshua from the daycare and you can stay with me."

With that, we went down the stairs and out to the garage where all of the Cullen vehicles were parked. I saw all of the Cullen vehicles; ranging from Rosalie's BMW to what I would have to guess to be Esme's Mercedes. We got into the Volvo and drove to the school. We talked about the different types of things that we like. For example music and cars. I'm good when it comes to naming the types of cars but I do get some wrong, some of the time. When we got to the school, I got out of the Volvo slowly because in truth, I just wanted to stay there with him but I knew if I did, Joshua would wonder why I was not there to pick him up. I got into my car as Edward took off to put the Volvo back in the garage. I got to the daycare with only a minute to spare.

"Mommy, what took you saow wong?" Joshua asked.

"Sorry buddy, I had a problem and I had to go to the hospital."

"Oh dear, what happened?" I turned around to see Esme, the woman from this morning.

"I, um, I passed out and I guess no one could get me to wake up so they took me to the hospital." I stated.

"Well, I guess they figured that you were well enough to go home and to drive then, yes?"

I didn't know how to answer that. Wait a minute. I don't know why I didn't put two and two together earlier. Hello, her name is Esme. I mentally smacked myself. "Actually Dr. Cullen said that I could go. He said that I didn't do anything in damage that would be the cause of me to stay there any longer."

"Okay dear. Well here is all what Joshua did today. We colored and drew pictures today, didn't we Joshua?" Esme asked Joshua.

He looked up at me and nodded. "Ms. Esme had us daw a piture of our family. See here's you, Daddy and Wamy." I glanced up at Esme to see her reaction, but I didn't expect to see her looking sad.

"She really does leave him all to you doesn't she?"

I looked back to the picture and said "Yes."

"Those poor dears. At least little Joshua thinks that he has a mommy that loves him. I would love to take his real mother and have a talk with her and make her realize what a precious gift she has."

I looked up at Esme, realizing that she thought that and that she did not say it aloud. "I agree with you, you know. I wish she would realize how amazing Joshua is but she just doesn't." She gasped but I continued, "She doesn't realize that everything could just disappear at a moments notice. I mean, it's not as if I wanted my mom to die, but she did. I should have to be his mother too. She should act like a real mother and take care of him. She doesn't have to take care of me, but she should with Joshua while she still has the chance." I was crying and beginning to sob at this time.

I looked over at Joshua and realized that he was playing with the blocks again. "I'm sorry Esme. I didn't mean to reply to your thought; I just had to get it off my chest."

"Don't worry about it darling. Here, come here." With that, she opened her arms wide and I ran into them and cried. She just stood there and let me cry. Being comforted by someone that cares was nice, but a little weird because in a sense, she is a stranger still. That and she is from The Saga.

I slowly stopped crying and let go of her. "I'm sorry Esme, but I have to leave. I have to go home. Come on Joshua, it's time to go home."

I carried Joshua out to my car and put him in his car seat. "Mommy, why were ou cwing?"

"I was just sad about something, that's all baby. Now don't worry about it okay. Let's go home and make dinner for everyone."

It was almost five when we pulled up in front of the house. Dad's car was sitting in the driveway, so that means he was home early.

"Let me take my stuff up to my room then I'll get dinner started Dad." I said as I walked in the door.

"Okay Baby Girl."

After I cleaned up from dinner, I went up to my room and took out the small amount of homework that I had been given. It should be simple since I had amazing grades at my other school. Before I began the homework, I went and checked up on Joshua. He was supposed to be taking a nap after dinner.

"Joshua, "I whispered not sure if he was asleep yet. I looked down at him on his bed and realized that he was indeed asleep. 'Good' I thought. I looked around him room and picked up a few of his toys that were lying around on the floor from when I was preparing dinner.

I went downstairs to make sure that none of Joshua's toys were down there either. Sure enough, there were a few so I brought them back up and put them in his toy chest. With all of the rooms clean now, I went back to my room to work on the homework.

While working on my homework, I heard a noise in Joshua's room. Thinking that Joshua probably fell out of bed, I waited for him to cry, but no crying came. Worried that something else happened I got up from my desk and went into his room.

"Joshua what are...? What are you doing in here?" I screeched out the last part. Worry evident in my voice.

**A/N: HAPPY NEW YEAR! Well that seemed kind of short and bad to me. Sorry I'm not really into the story right now. I just wanted to get a post up as soon as I could. Since I leave for Job Corps in only a few days, I need to pack, clean and sort everything in my room. I found about 10 different stories that I have begun and never done much with them. That is including this story. This chapter was never hand written, well except for a few lines but all of that was at the beginning because I didn't like what I had already written. I have no clue when the next chapter will ever get up simply because I don't know how much time I will have to be able to work on my stories.**


	5. Chapter 5 We wish Sorry

Holy smokes…. It has been over a year since I touched any of my stories. Well my notebooks got lost so I have to restart my thought process again. When that will happen I'm not sure because I am still at Job Corps and the site is blocked there. Within the next two years I promise that there will be at least one chapter for each story.

Sorry this has taken as long as it has. Just stick with me for another two years please.

Death By Insanity

Christina

P.S. I'm engaged.


	6. Chapter 6

To all of my readers, I am sorry but I will not be continuing either of my stories. If you wish to adopt them please send me a message and we will discuss the adoption.

If you haven't read my profile message then I will tell you here. I have decided to stop my writing. I know that it has been over two years since I last updated a story for real and I feel bad. I did love writing but to have a future with my boyfriend Jeb, I have to be realistic seeing as there is only one computer and it is used to look for stuff. Please forgive me readers as I hope to come back one day.

*Death By Insanity*  
Christina

Hope is all around. Love is in your heart.  
Peace is in your mind.

Pray for the Sandy Hook families and all of the other families that have lost someone to violence.  
Pray for our men and women that are still over seas and hope that they come home soon.

Here is a look into a story I might start/continue.

I can see you. I can see you smiling over there. Why don't you come over toward me?

Another glance and you're gone. I wonder where you went.

I turn to leave but you're at the door waiting to take me out.

Now what is going to happen because your eyes are red, skin is cold and you are fast?

You're not a vampire so what are you?


End file.
